Tag: chivalry

Is there anything hotter than a chivalrous man?

Well, it depends.

Chivalry is only attractive when it comes naturally. It’ shouldn’t feel forced or put on. That is, don’t make a big deal about opening the door for me. Don’t make a sweeping gesture when pulling out my chair or letting me enter the room first. A polite, “after you” is fine, but that’s all that is necessary. Just do these things because they are nice. I promise I won’t be offended and think you think I’m not strong enough to open my own door, adept enough to pull out my own chair or that you want to check out my ass. (Well, I might think the latter, and I might catch you doing it, but you should still let me walk into or out of a room ahead of you.)

These gestures are polite. They don’t make me feel inferior or incapable or like I’m a member of the weaker sex. (After all, it’s clear which gender keeps the world moving.) But I know most of us women have encountered a man who has come across more jerky, less knightly in his chivalrous approach.

As it is, we live in a society where manners seem to fall by the wayside. We text through meetings, averting our eyes from the person we are meeting with. We take phone calls during dinner. And let’s not forget my all time least favorite technological advancement: call waiting. I always waive it as an option for my home phone, and if on my iPhone I have a call coming in while I’m already talking to someone else, I end that call or let the incoming one go to voice mail.

So, when it comes to simple courtesies that are thoughtful, I’m not going to take offense.

In fact, extra points for draping your cape over a puddle so I don’t get my Prada shoes wet.